Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Now Boarding . . .

Well, here I am at Logan Airport's Terminal C (which Google mislabeled as "D" — stay your hand, Brother/Sister, I've written them about it), waiting for the boarding call and availing myself of the Logan Wi-Fi service to write up this morning's thoughts —

What's that you say, B/S? You think I'm foolish? Impetuous? Just because I accepted a one-way plane ticket to Lima from a set of mysterious limousine kidnappers?

One way, Phutatorius? ONE WAY?

Oh. Yes, right. I did forget to mention that the ticket was paid for the flight down only. That doesn't mean I'll be murdered or held for ransom once I'm down there. It only means I have an open-ended return date — and that my shady sponsors may not spot me for the flight back to Boston.

But no matter. I've sequestered $500 into savings for just that eventuality, and I can pay my own way home.

Look, Brother/Sister — you can say what you want, but the last time an anonymous benefactor booked me on a one-way international flight, I totally ended up hooking up with Philippine President Gloria Arroyo, and she was fantastic. So I know what I'm doing here, and I can take care of myself.

Oops! They're calling all rows, so I'd better wrap this up. Now where did I put my boarding pass?

(More from Houston, if I get a minute. The layover looks to be kinda tight.)


Anonymous said...

Can we make this a choose your own adventure?

Anonymous said...

Yes, tell us more about Arroyo. I hear her left nipple is inverted.

Phutatorius said...

But Dear, Sweet Anonyme (not to be confused with that bastard who took me to task over the peso): isn't that what life is — that is, "choosing one's own adventure?"

After all, a great philosopher once said, when confronted with some Calvinist tripe or another, "There's no mystical energy field that controls MY destiny. It's all a bunch of simple tricks and nonsense."

I leave you with that, and the promise that while I cannot, of course, turn my life on a dime to satisfy the whim of just anybody (what would be the point of world domination, after all, if my readers then did, in turn, dominate me?), I will endeavor to consider and respond to any concerns or issues that you care to articulate on this website — and double-quick, too, if you do me the favor and courtesy of leaving your name.

Anonyme #2: Were you talking about the one on the left if I'm looking at her, or the one on the left if I'm standing behind her?

Anonymous said...

You did her, so you tell me.